We forgot our anniversary again this year. It was last month, on the 11th.

We’ve now clocked five years of marriage and 11 years of togetherness, and I’m pretty sure we spent a lot of this time disagreeing about something or other. In fact I’ve even got a Top Five list:

Longest Cold War: Two days. I was renting back then and I was fuming over the fact that Alf had wanted to borrow some of my savings to invest in pork bellies. He didn’t get any money out of me, and he spent those two days sitting at home making me a felt doll.

Silliest End To A Fight: The one with my dog Love and the stolen Mars Bar.

Most Embarrassing Public Fight: Throwing a used diaper at Alf and insisting trashcans were around somewhere. Well, they weren’t. Used diaper came flying right back at me. Venue? The Central Library.

Most (And Probably Only) Intellectual Fight: Arguing over James Joyce’s less-than-flattering depictions of his classmates in A Portrait Of The Artist As A Young Man.

Most Recent Fight: Last week. Mid-week. Late night. Over oh I dunno, the same ol. Two days later I said to Alf, “Did you notice we were both wearing brown RSAF t-shirts that night?”

“Yeah… See, we can be in sync sometimes!“